first day on campus

Today was a lesson in flexibility. We were told that we were no longer going to 4 different campuses, but only 2 and that we were actually going there today! Good thing we already had our team split into 2. So without having any clue where I was going, I led half of our team to Toyo University to meet up with a student I had never met before who was going to take us around. Haha. I think the lesson I'm learning is that leadership is not so much knowing what you're doing, but more doing what you're doing with confidence. And it all worked out!

It was great going to Toyo and seeing this amazing campus! It's beautiful and so many students are there. We met students for the first time during lunch and struck up some good conversations. Out of maybe 30,000 Japanese students, there are only about 4 Christians that we know of. The two Japanese Campus Crusade for Christ students we met with - Yuki and Daisuke - were soo encouraged that our team was there to help them with their ministry! But I don't think they realized how much we were encouraged to see these far outnumbered Japanese Christians fully following Christ, despite much opposition and such few numbers. Their hearts for their peers shines through their countenance, and the sincerity of their faith is truly awe-inspiring. I know today I beheld Jesus in them. They are not discouraged nor are they going to give up on Toyo. How awesome that we get to work with them this summer! Here's some pics of the campus (a view from the roof on the right, inside the school on the left).

Here are our team members who are at Toyo! Please pray for Toyo University and Todai, our places of ministry this summer!!!

(Right to left: Lyndsey, Erin, me, Jessica, Grace, Wilson, Wayne, Daisuke, Yuki, Jon)

we arrived in Tokyo!

So we made it!!! Wow, it's been a whirlwind. Leaving at Orange County at 5 am on the 27th, we arrived in Tokyo at 3 pm the next day. But everything has been going well without any glitches (besides 2 pieces of lost luggage), we're all here in one piece.

So I didn't get to write much about our briefing before in my last post, so I'll tell you a little more about our team and a couple cool things that happened. We actually have 2 Epic Japan teams here. We had so many people apply and get accepted to our project that we have a total of 40 people!!! Since it was so big, we had to split into two teams, one in Tokyo and one in Nagoya. I am leading the Tokyo trip.

During one of our prayer and sharing times, Lyndsey on the Tokyo team shared with us a vision that she had right before briefing while she was praying for Japan. In her vision, she saw a picture of a darkened Japan, with only a few little faint lights on different places of the country. However, as she looked on the lights grew brighter and brighter, and new lights popped up all over the darkness. "God is really going to do something amazing this summer through our work," she encouraged us. Right after she shared, Sara (a girl on the Nagoya team) told Lyndsey that she had the exact same vision, but in a dream a few nights before!! God is already on the move, encouraging us with what is ahead. I am so excited. These are pictures of our team during briefing. (Epic Japan teams worshiping together on the left)


Now that we are here, we are settling into our apartments and getting adjusted to the time change. Today we'll go to church and start exploring our city.


Some facts about the "darker side" of Japan:

--Japan has the highest suicide rate of any country, accounting for 1/4 to 1/3 of the world's suicides every year.
--That's 1 person taking their life every 15 min.
--It is common for young people (from 15 to their early 20's) to meet on internet "suicide chat rooms" and later take their lives together.
--STD's and HIV run rampant, as there is little education about sexual health and a denial of the problem in the culture. (Many believe only foreigners can contract HIV)
--The social pressures of school and work are immense, pushing many into depression and loneliness in this wealthy country.

Please pray for Japan.

i'm here at briefing!

Monday 6/23, all the staff arrived here at Vanguard University to be prepped to lead our team. There are so many details to think of! We're not just learning about handling our team, conflict management, and discipleship but also how to manage the thousands of dollars we have to pay for flights, housing, food, outreaches, etc. There are so many factors that play into us getting to Japan. But with all the planning, my excitement grew as I looked forward to our students arriving. Here's a picture of our staff team planning together all the details of our trip. From left to right: Josh, Wayne, Steph, and me.


The next day, our students arrived in a flurry of baggage, excitement, remaining support checks, and questions. Finally we got to meet our team face to face! The people we have been praying for, talking to on the phone, reading applications for, and yet never really known in person. It's so exciting to put a name to the face! Here is our spectacular team!!!


Here is our team minus one. Roughly from left to right: Carolyn, Grace Shin, Stephanie, Justin, Anthony, Jon, Wilson, Josh, Lauren, Jessica, me, Erin, Kris, Wayne, Grace Sangalang, Melissa, Steph, and Lyndsey. Kester is missing. He's an international student from Indonesia who will meet us in Japan, so our team is not complete yet.

I can't believe we leave Friday morning! At 5 am, bright and early, we'll be hopping on a bus from here to LAX to get on our flight to Tokyo. I'd update you more, but I'm super exhausted already from this briefing time. But here's some prayer requests:

--Rest for me and the team, so I go into Japan refreshed
--For our team to be authentic and real with each other, to build a deep Christ community
--For safe travels
--For us to love the Japanese with the love of Jesus, and be prayer warriors for this country

Thanks for your prayers and support. I'll be keeping you updated!

on a personal note...

So I'm about to get vulnerable with you, but let me first explain why. I do not want to "glorify" my struggles or sin issues, and I don't want to just write to vent in an emo way. I write that I may have your prayers, to bring darkness to light, and for accountability purposes. Even in my young Christian life (6 years!) I have witnessed many Christian leaders and peers fall away and somehow I always get scared for myself. I can begin to understand why, as I have experienced this past year the loneliness that can coexist with ministry leadership. It is a battle to live a Christian life. So I don't want to pretend that I have it all together, or that I am competent in myself to do ministry. On the contrary, I feel very weak and needy of God's strength and the support of my brothers and sisters in Christ. And yet, I praise God who uses such "foolish things to shame the wise," and "when I am weak, then I am strong." So please pray for me! I need help.

The past couple days have been shockingly difficult. I've been feeling down, and I know that this also has to do with spiritual attack that I am under since I leave for Summer Project Briefing this morning. I have had struggles with depression and low self image in the past, and I feel some old lies coming back to drag me down again. This has also affected my relationship with Josh, my co-leader for the Epic Tokyo Team and (interestingly enough) boyfriend. Having done some ministry leading together this year, we have begun to notice the trend that often when we have big leadership responsibilities arising, our relationship is the first thing that gets tough. So often we have fought the night before a big outreach or program! And our relationship does affect our ability to do ministry. Please pray for us.

That's how I was feeling the past couple days, but tonight we had a conference call with our staff leaders (me, Josh, Steph, and Wayne) and we spent some time praying for one another. I feel so nice and refreshed!! God is faithful, even when I feel I am in darkness. He always leads me in His ways of righteousness! But I can still use your prayers for this summer. Please pray that:

--The hearts of the Japanese people would be open
--The enemy would not gain a stronghold in Josh's and my relationship
--That I would not be weighed down by fear or anxiety, but that I would cast them all at Jesus' feet
--That Jesus' love would be made more real to me than ever before

I do have such a hard time realizing God's grace for me, when I am such a perfectionist! Ahh...

preparing for tokyo!

My staff team and I are making the final preparations for our Epic Tokyo Summer Project. It's been a bit crazy seeing things becoming a reality. But I don't think it'll all be real until we are actually there!

Last night, a few of our team members and staff who are from southern Cali got together in Orange County at Yogurtland to meet each other. Here is a pic from that excursion:

From left to right around the table, this is Kris, Albert, Josh (staff), Wilson, Jon, Vivian (staff), Grace, Lyndsey, Brendan (my brother, not going with us to Japan), and me (staff).

We had a great time getting to know one another, talking about our fears and expectations, and telling some fun stories over our pay-by-weight cups of yogurt and toppings.

I should be posting more blogs as we get ready for Japan, and while we are there I will keep you updated regularly since I know there will be lots to tell!

our stellar Tokyo team!

So on my last blog (the one right below), I told you guys about Jessica. She said it was okay that I am writing about her, and that she's excited that her testimony can encourage others!

So just a recap... Jessica is the one who came to Christ at Epic Conference in February. I had the divine opportunity to pray with her as she confessed hard stuff from her life with me for the first time during a night of worship and confession. Talking to her after the conference, I found out that she was leaving behind a life in the party scene at Oregon State and trying to grow in her relationship with God, without much Christian community around her.

Now this new believer is coming with us to Japan to share the gospel with Japanese students, only a few months after receiving Christ herself! But God is already moving in her life to cause her to be a bold and faithful witness.

Last week Jessica told me that at OSU, Epic put on a conference for students. At this conference, she invited some of her non-Christian friends who were also in the party scene to go. During one time of worship, Jessica was praying for a girl friend of hers when her friend started breaking down into tears. She let go of her past life and accepted Christ on the spot!!

Wow. I am praising God for His work in and through Jessica's new faith to bring her friends to Christ! I know God is already preparing our Epic Tokyo Team for an amazing summer of BREAKTHROUGH in Japan.

Please be praying for Jessica, too. I know that God is doing incredible things in her life, but at the same time the enemy is angry that she is now a daughter of the Most High God. Pray that she finds all of her worth in Jesus, not in guys, body image, or anything else. Pray that she would be healed of past wounds and that God would fill her with His spirit and lead her. Also pray for her financial support as she is raising the $5000 it costs to go to Japan. Let me know if you want to support Jessica financially. You can make a check out to Campus Crusade for Christ and email me so I can tell you where to send it. Thanks for reading!